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Twenty Seven. Libra. Illinois. Chemically Imbalanced at best.
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ijustwanttoodisapear-deactivate:
I’m sorry mum
I’m sorry I’m such a disappointed to you
I’m sorry I’m not like my siblings
I’m sorry you are embarrassed by me
I’m sorry I’m fucked up
Sorry I take up you’re time
Sorry I have problems too
Sorry I’m lazy
Sorry I’m unmotivated
Sorry I’m such a waste of space
I’m trying!!
I feel so alone lately, I just want a break from people and from life… I also want to vent my emotions but I don’t want to bother anyone… not like they care or understand either. If my psychiatrist didn’t get it, why would they? I just wish I could stop time for a second so I could catch up with life for a bit
Bro how about we call each other couplely pet names and blur the lines between friends and more does that sound like something you’d be interested in
i hate when girls feel dumb for trying to see the best in people and then end up hurt or disappointed like no!! it’s those people that were dumb for misleading you. they took advantage of your kindness and generosity, and they’ll rot for it
“I thought about you a lot cause you confused me, but when I started to understand you.. I think about you even more.”
You dominate my mind - eUë
I feel like throwing up, hoping to get rid of some feelings with all this vomit.
“I choose you the way I choose to have a cup of coffee every morning, with an eagerness and desire to press you to my lips and taste of your beautiful soul..”
I choose you with the tenderest care, love, and respect - eUë
you’re constantly on my mind and often i wonder if we ever think of each other at the same time.
“I was never really a hugger before. I was never really in favour of touch. All the touches I experienced in childhood were those with a certain snake-like intent accompanied with honey promises for superficial gratification. I became a toy for hungry eyes and even hungrier hands. ‘Beaufitul’ was a word thrown around so carelessly that it started to sound more of a curse to me. Its blackness and effects ignored because it became the only bridge I could cross in order to feel any connection in this world. I never thought I deserved better. I never thought there was better… until suddenly, I met the kind of hands you read about in books. The ones that correspond to a genuine smile and gentle eyes; a wonder and hesitation conveyed with the desire to learn more about how I would want to be touched without asking anything in return. For the first time ever, I was approached with the kind of respect I deserved all along. And suddenly, I was allowed to be soft instead of strong.”— Astonished, i.c.f.
I work my ass off just to come home and deal with bullshit. I can’t wait until I’m out. It’s only a matter of time.
